Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Mystery man

Last night I stopped by Smith's on a mission to replenish the bare necessities--oatmeal, spinach, granola bars...from the sound of it, I actually eat a healthy diet.  Joke's on you!  Anyhow, after wandering the very poorly planned aisles of the store, I popped up to registers to self-check.  I saw an attractive fella at one of the other registers who was talking on his cell phone, so I smiled. 

He waved. "Hi!"

And this was not just a friendly, you-are-a-kind-stranger "hi," either.  A full-on, we know each other and have had many conversations type of greeting.

I counted myself lucky that he was on the phone and couldn't devote his attention to me or my stash of cheap light margarine (because people judge each other on their grocery purchase decisions, right?).  My thoughts tumbled around. "Puh-leeeease don't let him finish at the same time as me and try to start up a conversation.  He's on the phone, right?  He certainly can't want to talk to me.  He was just being friendly.  How on earth do I know this guy??  Be cool.  Good thing you look cute."

Grocery checking has never been so hurried or urgent for me.  Handle the eggs with care, weigh the bananas, slide the card, snatch the receipt, try to struggle to get those stupid plastic bags off the holder...home free!

Wrong.

Whether he planned it on purpose or not, I will never know--mostly because I cannot figure out who this guy was!--but he finished and came over as I was grabbing the last of my groceries and started up small talk.

Him: "How have you been?"
Me: (awkwardly) "Good!  Good!"  (Inner dialogue: "Just act cool and keep the conversation really vague...he'll never know.")
Him: "Just out picking up a few late-night things?"
Me: "Yep, I've got a long day tomorrow and needed some stuff."
Him: "Finals and stuff?"
Me: "Yeah...but I'm almost done!" (Thinking: "He knows I'm in school...?  Is that just a lucky guess?")

The conversation continued for about another twenty seconds as we walked out to our cars, and luckily I made it through without blowing my cover.  Heaven shone upon me with the fact that our cars were mercifully parked on opposite sides of the lot.

Immediately, I texted two friends about the incident.  One of my friends responded, "I don't think you would forget a cute guy."  To which I answered, "Right?? I have a good brain filing system for attractive dudes...Maybe he's just a cute guy who was trying out some pick-up strategy of pretending he knows a girl and seeing how far she'll play along."

This girl will play along the entire time.

1 Comments:

Blogger Amaryah said...

Maybe he thought YOU were someone else, and then by the time he realized you weren't who he thought you were, HE was the one trying not to blow HIS cover! He probably went home thinking "I wonder who that girl was at Smith's who knew me..."

April 25, 2012 at 9:08 AM

 

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